What to do?

I feel as if i'm being constantly followed and watched. as if it's trying to assest me.  on how they want to take care of me. or if i'm really a threat to them. i've taken extra percautions. i can't decide what i should do. should i make it known to them that i know there there? that could start a battle. but you never know. I feel there evil presence around me constantly.  i know there apart of our new threat. i wont back down. i'm not weak . and i'm going to make sure they know that. as soon as they make a move against me or someone i care about. There as good as dead. they should watch out. were not going to go down. not now. not ever. 

Why? What if?

I constantly find my self asking. Why? Why me? and What if? like What if  I never me Jade? would i still be here today? What if the darkness won? Why out of everyone on this stoopid planet.why me? why am i the outcast? the one thats mocked and hated. The one with the imagination and different adventures and the friends that no one can see. but i can. They call me Crazy. they scorn me. they mock me. they pretend to be nice to me when there asked to. but you can tell. there making fun of me. telling me i'm stoopid. psychotic.I'm unwanted. unloved. and that i'm very much ALONE.  But why do i deserve to be alone? if everyone else is allowed to have someone. not have to hide there true self because they'll be mocked. Why  do i have to be the one person the world seems to not care about? And when i find someone that does care about me. Who likes me for who i am. Everyone tries to tear us apart. and whenever were together and other people are there, they try and separate us. Make me be alone. Be the only person not having fun. And it's all because there selfish lying bastards. (excuse my language but it's the truth) and because the one person who pays attention to me is in the more popular crowd. everyone thinks we shouldn't be friends. let alone Best Friends. but little do they know. were actually sisters. Separated during a terrible war. where our minds were wiped and were sent here. even if they knew i doubt that would matter. But would it change if they knew I was a queen? and they way they've been treating me could have them punished? (aka. beheaded if Jade would let me.) But who would believe that? they already think i'm stoopid. they'd just say it's that weird imagination of yours. but guess what!? NEWS FLASH!!! IT'S REAL!!! the Threats, Kingdom , Species,Wars , etc... i guess it doesn't matter how many times i say it's real. no one will believe me. but i'll keep trying pressing on. maybe one day i'll get help. maybe one day people will actually care about me. not fake. but real. -sighs- but maybe that day will never come. I will never know for sure.  I guess thats the tricky thing with the future. you wont know until it happens.

New Problems

So much to do now since the king out of his rain...(however you spell that) but theres something bigger. something else out there that is threatening us. What is it? I don't know. I went to the castle to do some digging in the library  i found some journals of our parents. the king did mention once that they were getting close to something and thats why he did what he did. (or something like that) Whats the something they were getting close too? hopefully they wrote something about it. Whatever it is i bet it's dangerous. and we need to find out so we can do something about it. Cytania is looking more lively by the days. all sorts of people and races have moved back in and theres a huge sense of peace. witch is really good even though there is a ton of work to still do. i've started training new recruits to help protect when the next war comes. it's going to be harder. the enemy will be stronger so we have to be ready. and this time the Kingdom will not fall. we will keep it. I will be leaving for a year and a half. i know it's not the ideal time to leave. but it needs to be done. while i'm gone i should be able to do some recruiting to come and help. Jade will be doing it pretty much alone when i leave. So she'll need all the help she can get. As soon as i get back i'll jump back in and help. and hopefully it wont be to late.